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Recently I was diagnosed with AAADD – that’s Age Activated Attention Deficiency Disorder

It manifests itself like this:


I decide to water the garden


As I go to the garage to turn on the hose I look at my car in the driveway and realise it needs washing


So I go back into the kitchen and pick up my car keys, then I notice the post on the kitchen table that I had picked up from the hall earlier


I decide to go through the post before I wash the car


I lay my car keys on the table, sort out the bills and throw the junk mail into the bin that is sitting under the table.


I notice that the bin is full.


So I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the bin.


Then I think since I’m going to the dustbin anyway I may as well pay the bills and post them in the post-box at the bottom of the lane.


I pick up my cheque book from the table and realise there is only one cheque left and that the new cheque book is in the desk in my study.


So I go into the study to my desk where I find the can of Coke I had been drinking earlier


I’m going to look for my cheque book, but I need to move the Coke somewhere safe so I don’t knock it over


I realise the Coke is now warm so I decide to put it in the fridge to cool off


As I head back towards the kitchen with my Coke a vase of flowers catches my eye, they need watering


I put the Coke on the kitchen counter and discover my reading glasses that I had been looking for all morning,


I decide I had better put them in my desk so I will know where they are, but first the flowers still need watering


I put the glasses back on the counter and fill a container with water


I suddenly spot the TV remote which someone has left on the kitchen table


I realise that we will need the remote when we come to watch TV tonight, but that I probably won’t remember that it’s on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the lounge where it belongs


But first I must water the flowers


I pour the water into the vase, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.


So, I put the remote back on the table and get some towels to wipe up the spill.


Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:


The garden isn't watered
The car isn’t washed
The bills aren’t paid

The bin is still full
There is a warm can of Coke on the kitchen counter

The flowers don’t have enough water,
There is still only 1 cheque in my cheque book,
I can’t find the remote,
I can’t find my glasses, 

I don’t remember what I did with the car keys.


Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I’m really baffled because I know I was busy all the damn day, and I’m really tired.


I realise this is a serious problem, and I’ll try to get some help for it, but first I’ll check my e-mail….


Do me a favour, forward this message to everyone you know, because I don’t remember who the hell I’ve sent it to.


Don’t laugh — if this isn’t you yet, your day is coming!!

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