Sir Anthony Regents-Park

The old M47N will go in with the gearbox, prop and ECU. Hardly worth the bother.

Someone I know has a 1988 E24 with this problem - the new idle control valve is utterly useless. Squeeze the air pipe that goes into the ICV and the idle speed drops.

Don't forget to remove the fuel pump before you throw the engine away as it's £100 worth. The crank has a value as well. I'd say the liner slipped first, causing the carnage, maybe brought on by a piston seizing. What a load of shit those things are.

I've got one, 35 quid.

The N43. The oily bits are anything but lovely as they are the worst for timing chain issues. I work on a 116i for a guy with one of these heaps. It just decided to start misfiring etc etc and I won't touch these with a shitty stick as you just end up wasting hours chasing your tail with various real and bogus fault codes. It went to a garage to be diagnosed - one dead injector, as per. I told him to get a decent used one fitted, coded and then get rid of the sodding thing. One £900 bill later..........and it WILL go tits up again.

Air suspension was only standard on UK cars. In Europe it was an option so you'll get a pair of springs new cheap enough. You can use the existing dampers as well for now and see how you get on. They are different part numbers between air/steel spring cars but they'll still work as dampers. You will need to code the warning lights out of the cluster - or fit a saloon one. They're cheap enough.

It's £500 worth. Probably okay for that.

Don't touch the turbo, it stays where it is. The Manifold unbolts from the head. Before fitting, check that the turbo mating surface on the new manifold is 100% flat.

Vanos faults are often wear in the front cam ledges. The cams have steel sealing rings to prevent pressurised oil leaking back, but the steel rings wear grooves into the alloy housings (yes, steel rings on alloy FFS) leading to oil pressure dropping and Vanos faults. It's enough to render a car scrap because the inlet cam ledge is part of the head. Bloody stupid design and it'll get them all eventually.

I just drive intimidatingly close to them. On the other hand: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZdDxjge5hmY

The N52 is lovely when it works but they're just at that age now (have been for a while) where they are just a pain in the arse. The electric coolant pump everyone moans about is the cheap bit. It's bloody Vanos faults and oil leaks that does for them. That's the problem with modernish BMW's and old ones just rust and piss oil out. I find E46's just too old and needy now. There is however a superbly made, reliable 3 Series and here it is: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lexus_IS_(XE20) If you think I'm kidding, try driving one. Like the old IS200, these are clearly ripped off from a 3 Series but they're properly made. Cheap now as well.

They did. They relaunched 20+ years ago in a small farm estate place just off the A34/M40.

I was in the big Sytners today having the E60 recall done, and had a wander round. Most of it is good looking stuff really and whilst it's not top end premium, they're nicely finished cars that drive well. The BMW business model is a very good one. Hell, the more I look at the new 7, the less offensive the grille looks.

BMW made gas 316i and 518i cars 1995-2000. That was natural gas, with a hydrogen E65 in the mid 2000's. It was a complete flop. The manuafacture and storage of Hydrogen is the biggie.

How much was your car new 700 years ago? Bet it was 30 grand.