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About oldjohnny

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  • Birthday 03/11/1946

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    Running cars I cannot afford.
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  • Garage
    2003 E60 530d

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  1. oldjohnny


    I have often wondered why divers on boats always fall backwards into the sea. Appears the answer is quite simple. If they fell forwards they would still be in the f...... boat!
  2. oldjohnny

    Angel eye replacement still not working

    Had the same fault recently. Both parking lights were working ok but the offside was dimmer as was the dipped beam. The 'good' one failed so I removed both and replaced with 10 watt bulbs, finding in the process that the dim one was a Halfords 5 watt special. When both headlights were out I took the opportunity to replace all bulbs to prevent going through this again. Thinking that was the reason for the difference I was really annoyed to find it was still the same after replacing it. The offside halo and dipped beam are still dimmer. Could this have anything to do with the LCM you mentioned earlier, (no idea what this is by the way) or is a bad earth more likely?
  3. oldjohnny

    Parking light or sidelight bulb

    On each side of these bulb holders you will find a small lug. I used a soldering iron to remove them after which the bulb and holder slide out and you can replace the bulb only. (Lumbro original BA9S H10watt on Amazon £9.99). To reseal I again used a soldering iron and melted a piece of cable tie where the original lug was. As you will have gathered I run my E60 on a really tight budget and this worked a treat. Before you remove yours, sometimes the holders themselves are a little loose and a simple tap brings them back to life.
  4. oldjohnny

    Milk Top Dust Cover.

    Could it be that I am now driving the fastest milk cart in the west?
  5. oldjohnny

    Milk Top Dust Cover.

    Would that be a red one?
  6. oldjohnny

    Milk Top Dust Cover.

    Regarding other dairy products, perhaps if you are a young man you could boast about your imaginary prowess by leave a few bits of cheese under the seats and boast that you'd had a few girls in recently
  7. oldjohnny

    Milk Top Dust Cover.

    Cheers. Will run on for the time being as all seems well now. Car is worth about three cheers and not worth spending a lot more on it hence the designer replacement spurious part. Runs really well, but constant knock/tapping evident since turbo rebuild. Checked all the usual suspects but consenus seems to be a possible bent rod due to starvation. I do low mileage nowdays, paid very little for it, spent quite enough to date, and can't hear the noise when driving so will continue until it decides enough is enough.
  8. oldjohnny

    Milk Top Dust Cover.

    Hi Folks. I posted earlier about a grinding noise on turning in the nearside steering and a knock in the strut. Turned out the dust cover at the top of the strut (under bonnet) was missing and a few foreign objects had gotten into the ballrace. Spannerman sprayed something down into it and told me to test it. If it was ok I had to pack it up with grease when I got home. All this has worked a treat with the steering much smoother than it ever was and the knock gone completely. I phoned to tell him and said I would get a dust cover on ebay to prevent any further problems. "Buy f...all" was the reply. "The screwtop from a litre bottle of milk is 30mm and clicks exactly into place". And it did! Just hope the birds don't peck through it when the bonnet is open
  9. oldjohnny

    Power Steering Noise.

    Had the car checked over yesterday. Steering components and fluid all fine. Explained that there was a clunk/knock at times from the nearside strut as well. Further inspection uncovered a strange fault. Looking down on the top of the strut (under bonnet) there is a cap which covers a bearing. It is missing. Some debris had collected in between the small bearings. Quick clean, then oiled and topped over with grease. Steering noise gone completely and the 'knock' as well. Maybe temporary but I don't care. For once a quick diagnosis and cheap fix. Will definitely do the lottery this week as my luck just may be in!
  10. oldjohnny

    Power Steering Noise.

    Hi Folks. Just developed a creaking sort of noise in the power steering, like rubber being stretched on the nearside when turning. Car is Nov 2003 530d. I have just returned from the clinic for suicidal tendencies treatment since buying this car. Is it time to return for another course or is there any chance it may be a common and dare I say it, inexpensive fix?
  11. oldjohnny

    E61 ‘eyebrow’ yellow light

    Really sorry to read about this Ant, but it reinforces my belief that there is extra protection in driving a big, well built car. The result may have been a lot worse had it been a mini, etc. My Missus had nothing more than a bruised chest after a 45 mph head on collision in this C class Merc.
  12. oldjohnny

    Headlight Earth Problem?

    The parking light (halo) and dipped headlight (xenon) are dimmer on the nearside compared with the offside on the E60 530d 2003. Changed both bulbs but no improvement. Could this be a bad earth and can anyone advise on how and where I could check this, or is it best handled by an auto electrician? Probably coincidental, but the parking distance control came up as faulty for a couple of days but now seems to be working fine again. (boot is bone dry). Cheers.
  13. oldjohnny

    Wing mirror paint peeling

    Mine are worse than yours rOryb. Heavy flaking on both. I too have been wondering if the plastic base plate and hinge can be sourced anywhere as the wing mirrors themselves are good. Don't really want to remove everything to touch this up so any advice as to how to take the bad look off them and what to use would be welcome
  14. oldjohnny

    OE Thermostat 530d

    Best to look at the scenarios on this topic by goNzO. Note that there are three stats to consider. May be better to buy them from BMW ( if you are fitting them yourself ) in case you encounter the problems with new stats experienced by many of us. At least you can get them changed again in the event of failure. I couldn't be bothered finding out which of my two new ones failed within a couple of months and just went down the £5 Renault 5 stat in the top hose route. Just a matter of personal choice depending on the age and value of your car. As I said before, mine is worth about three cheers so tried this out to save money and it has worked to date. Not long after I bought this car I started to get holes in my trouser pockets, now I have no pockets at all and the arse is hanging out of them. Never seems to end.
  15. Hi Folks. This old fool has removed the headlights on 2003 E60 to replace a blown xenon bulb. Obviously replacing both. Religiously took iphone photos to remember where things go, but being quite chuffed at getting this far I got careless and removed the bulbs without noting which way they go back. They will arrive on Thursday so can anyone tell me which way they should be re- inserted, in relation say to the solid thin 'bar' which runs lenghtwise. The bulb seems to fit in two positions or does it actually matter. Many thanks.