Jump to content


Popular Content

Showing most liked content since 06/25/2011 in all areas

  1. 37 points

    RIP Donut

    dear all, please can I just say a huge thank you to you all behalf of my painfully missed brother Donut, me and my family. Your kind words and obvious affection for him is one of the very few light moment in what has been a catastrophically shitty 36 hours. Special thanks to Duncan and Sandip for their time talking with me this morning about Darren and the future of his beloved forum. I will keep the two of them posted on funeral dates to share as appropriate, and would invite any of you who personally knew my brother to attend. kindest regards, Stu (Lildonut).
  2. 23 points

    RIP Donut

    Once again, thank you all so very much for your kind comments and overwhelming support. I am so very proud that my brother brought such a diverse and cohesive group of people together through his work on this forum. Your wonderful offers of donations to charity are so greatly appreciated - I will confirm the details of exactly how it will be coordinated in due course, but my family and I would be very grateful should any of you choose to support Wiltshire Air Ambulance. These guys do a frankly humbling job, under extremely difficult and traumatic circumstances. I have supported this cause for some time, never expecting that I or my family might ever need to use them in such a way. Whilst there was nothing they could do to save my brother at the scene, every donation they get may just save someone else. Please donate as much or as little as you want to, all will be gratefully received. I will ask one of the admins to start a new separate 'sticky' thread shortly with the details of how to make your donations. Please please give as generously as you ca in support of this amazing cause.
  3. 22 points

    My E26!

    So, at last, after the best part of a year, I finally have my M1 at home! After keeping my eye out for a long time for an M1 I found one in July last year that looked like it fitted the bill. As with many M1’s the car history is not fully known, but it was first supplied by BMW leasing to an address in Munich in 1980 and from there found its way to Switzerland from where it was imported to the UK, but not registered, in 2011. Mechanically the car is in very good condition, there are some cosmetic rubber components that are not 100%, but replacements for most M1 parts are very difficult to find. The engine is not the original, the engine number on the block does not match up with the number it should, it’s not even the correct format! However, it appears that the engine is of a higher performance than standard. There was a company that tuned M1 engines, it’s possible that this is one of these. The car was also fitted with a stainless steel silencer. The car was originally white, at some point had been painted silver and then painted white again. The last repaint was done by a company that specialised in building luxury fibre glass yachts and they have done a very good job of painting the fibre glass body. The interior was originally black leather and cloth but, possibly when painted silver, had been re-trimmed in red leather with red carpets. I believe that the dash had also been covered red, but this had been reverted to black because of reflections on the windscreen. The interior had been done very well, but I wanted to return it to as close to original as possible. Also, the way the carpet had been done it was difficult to use the accelerator without hitting the brake, unless you had very narrow feet!! This is what it looked like when I bought it. Sourcing the materials required to restore it to its original appearance took much, much longer than I anticipated. The seat cloth is unique to the M1 but I managed to find a source in Germany and bought 4 sq m plus a genuine roof panel which is covered in the same material (the roof had been covered red too). The leather used in the M1 has finish that is difficult to replicate, you can get close but not exactly the same using widely available leather. Again I managed to source some of the original leather, a total of 18 sq m was needed, 4 full hides. I also found a genuine new hand brake lever and handle and a new gear knob. The backs of the seats are covered in a black tweed like cloth, this proved very difficult to find something that looked identical and impossible to find the original material. Eventually I managed to find some material that was a pretty close match. The carpets turned out to be very frustrating. There are 9 pieces of carpet, two floor pieces, 2 wheel arch pieces, two pieces down each side of the transmission tunnel (4 in all) and a piece at the back. I managed to find 5 genuine pieces of the 9 pieces required, but the material is impossible to replicate. In the end I had to settle for a reasonable colour match high quality carpet, it’s probably much better quality than the original, but I was a little disappointed that I could not use the genuine stuff. Other miscellaneous parts that were required were a replacement radio (which currently does not work!), a brand new set of original floor mats (which need to be fastened down somehow as they currently slide right under the pedals!), a genuine replacement rear silencer and twin black tail pipes, replacement rear window seal, black flock finish centre cubby hole (the original had been covered red), leather covered ash tray, a genuine rear ///M1 decal (from the USA), new wheel centre caps with the old BMW logo and I even found an original unused M1 English instruction manual. I also found a genuine new mph speedometer, the original kph speedometer rear just 5055 when replaced, I don’t know if this is the original, it may have been replaced when the engine was replaced. A selection of hoses and gaskets and other odds and ends were obtained from BMW classic, I wasn’t sure if they would be needed or not but though it best to start building a spares bank just in case! I collected the car from Munich Legends on 1st July after they had given it a thorough inspection. I drove it to a Shell garage and back to fill up with V-Power, just enough to get the car good and hot. We then did a final inspection on the ramps to check for any leaks, remarkably there was nothing at all, dry as a bone, the ML techs said they had never seen an M1 with no leaks! I left ML to drive the car home just after midday, you might remember that 1st July was a rather hot day, my route took me clockwise round the M25 past Heathrow where the recorded temperature reached 36.7C! I was a little apprehensive to say the least, the temperature on the motorway was probably significantly higher, but the car did not miss a beat over the 275 mile trip. The air con is rather rudimentary, but it did its job, just! I’ve had the car up on ramps again since I got home, still pretty much bone dry, just a very small amount of sweating from a couple of places. Things left to do include: - Repair the radio - Repair the clock, some of the illuminated elements don’t work. - Find a way to anchor the floor mats. - Find a way to secure the spare wheel, there were two designs, the one that matches the main wheels can’t be fastened down using the supplied bolt! - Find a replacement left front indicator, it has a small crack, part NLA. - Find a replacement right window guide, it has a small cut, part NLA. - Find as many spare parts as possible! Finally, here are a couple of pictures as she is now, I'll add some more detailed pictures later.
  4. 22 points

    RIP Donut

    I've just spoken to Stuart (lildonut) on the phone and have agreed to set up a fundraising page as the family would like to track how much Donuts memory will raise. I'll set this up today and share details here as well as a sticky.
  5. 21 points

    Today we remember Donut

    Today marks the passing of a year since we lost the man who was a friend to many and a figurehead of our community. As we take a moment to reflect on the loss that is to our online family, spare a thought for his real-life family as they remember their good times with Darren. This forum owes a great debt to Donut. The thriving membership we enjoy; the positive attitude of our collective - these are things Darren worked hard to achieve. Our own tribute is to strive to stay true to his guidance, to ensure that the forum is the best it can be and that we continue to build not just a resource for all things 5 Series, but a thriving community. Donut set a high benchmark, and while we may have struggled at times to hit his high standards, we will always aim to continue the good work he did. There was an overwhelming response to fundraising for the Wiltshire Air Ambulance last year. Darren's family have asked us to pass on a message of thanks to each and every one of you who donated so generously, and have asked us to share this certificate by way of thanks. Let's all find a moment today to remember the Boss Man. Find yourself a quiet moment with a sugary baked good, look back on the impact Darren had on our lives and give thanks for what we have. On behalf of all of us at BMW5
  6. 15 points

    RIP Donut

    When we log in, we see the 5 logo etc, I'd like to see a pic of the big lad next to that. I met him, he was a proper man, I respected him, I don't respect many. Every time I log in and see he's gone, my stomach goes over. I'm not an emotional sort. But who he was brings emotion, that shows you how special he was. Because, he spent a lot of his life taking this place from what John built, and making it a bigger and better thing, for the use of all. How great a man is that. To to his family I say, you must of been and always will be, of the big man, a very big man in my eyes, that did what he did. may the thought of him make you smile, even if there is a tear mixed in, remember he would smile with you. once again, rest easy big fella, rest easy. Respect to you. All the best mate. Tom.
  7. 14 points

    So I picked up my M5 Touring

    Initial impressions are that we are going to be firm friends!
  8. 14 points

    RIP Donut

    I have been off for a couple of days and only just seen this Really cannot believe what I am seeing as was only talking to him Friday. Darren was such a kind, generous and friendly guy who has done so much, not just for this forum but for us as a business as well. The gentle giant will be very sadly missed and we will making a substantial donation R.I.P Daz Phil, Tony and Jon @ Cotswold BMW
  9. 13 points

    For those born before 1985.....

    FOR THOSE BORN BEFORE 1985 According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 60's, 70's and early 80's probably shouldn't have survived, because our baby cots were covered with brightly coloured lead-based paint which was promptly chewed and licked. We had no childproof lids on medicine... bottles, or latches on doors or cabinets and it was fine to play with pans. When we rode our bikes, we wore no helmets, just flip-flops and fluorescent 'spokey dokey's' on our wheels. As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or airbags and riding in the passenger seat was a treat. We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle and it tasted the same. We ate chips, bread and butter pudding and drank fizzy juice with sugar in it, but we were never overweight because we were always outside playing. We shared one drink with four friends, from one bottle or can and no-one actually died from this. We would spend hours building go-carts out of scraps and then went top speed down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into stinging nettles a few times, we learned to solve the problem. We would leave home in the morning and could play all day, as long as we were back before it got dark, no one was able to reach us and no one minded. We did not have Play stations or X-Boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on TV, no videotape movies, no surround sound, no mobile phones, no personal computers, no DVDs, no Internet chat rooms. We had friends, we went outside and found them. We played elastics & rounders, and sometimes that ball really hurt! We fell out of trees, got cut, and broke bones but there were no law suits. We had full on fist fights but no prosecution followed from other parents. We played knock-the-door-­run-away and were actually afraid of the owners catching us. We walked to friends' homes, we also, believe it or not, WALKED to school; we didn't rely on mummy or daddy to drive us to school, which was just round the corner. We made up games with sticks and tennis balls. We rode bikes in packs of 7 and wore our coats by only the hood. The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke a law was unheard of, they actually sided with the law. This generation has produced some of the best risk takers and problem solvers and inventors, ever. The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility,­ and we learned how to deal with it all. And you're one of them. Congratulations­! Pass this on to others who have had the luck to grow as real kids, before lawyers and government regulated our lives, for our own good. For those of you who aren't old enough, thought you might like to read about us..............
  10. 12 points
    The Flying Banana

    RIP Donut

    I have already posted on this but the more I read throughout day the more you think about how precious life really is and how much of a loss a friend, colleague, aquaintance or loved one is …here is a young man who has lost his life on an innocent drive due to an accident , any death is tragic but to know of someone who is full of life then gone must be a massive shock to those close, I really feel for them , yes you read about deaths everyday but it’s been said before today , only 22 hours ago he had posted on the forum , he was answering questions about the new forum software etc, he was the backbone of the forum , and then gone in an instant, even if you hadn’t actually met him you just felt a bit closer than other deaths ..so so sad and hopefully whatever is out there for him in the next life he is OK . ..perhaps deep but as Calypso said earlier today last night’s events defiantly make you think about your own life and those around you . Take care all and RIP Donut .
  11. 12 points

    RIP Donut

    At the appropriate time we may agree that the forum send some floral tribute and contribute to the family chosen charity. what do you think, re later action?
  12. 12 points
    The uk has disappeared right up its own politically correct arsehole, soon all we will have is nervous looking namby pamby gimps with no personel opinions whatsoever who can't crack a joke unless it's been approved by some smug twats round a table
  13. 12 points
    NIKON D300 Nikkor 1.8 85mm Lens
  14. 12 points

    What did you do to your E39 today ?

    Gave mine a day off and went out in this instead......
  15. 12 points

    My good deed for the day

    I was at McDonald's on Saturday n found a wallet which contained an old pensioner dudes id and about £500 cash. Looked around for him but he wasn't there. Decided best not hand it in at McDonald's, who knows where the cash would end up. So took it home n had a rummage through n found a list of 3 phone numbers. Eventually got through to one, his daughter in England. Turns out he's on holiday here for 2 weeks visiting daughter in law n grandkids n had lost all his saved up pension money. Few calls later and it's returned to a very happy n grateful elderly dude who can now relax n enjoy rest of his time here with family. I might make it to heaven yet! But what would you have done? Handed it all in? Kept the cash n handed in an empty wallet? Or kept the cash n thrown the wallet away?
  16. 11 points

    BMW Documentation

    Hi all, Over the years I have managed to accumulate various pieces of BMW documentation from an assortment of sites and sources. I thought it time to place them all in one location where everyone can access them. They are available from my Google Drive: https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=0BxDd4Jzlov8Efmg5VVVEaTZVYkplN3MzaGZLQUEzaWFjU0luMl81cW9oSGxlOENGbTlKQW8&usp=sharing The folder currently contains the following: E60 engineer training modules; M Division documentation; Various E60 manuals and guides, and an assortment of BMW presentations. As I find more I will upload them to the Drive and update this post. Mods - Bearing this in mind, perhaps it would be handy to make this pinned? Best, Horsey *Please note I do not own the documents or claim to be the author of them*
  17. 11 points

    Proud to be British!

    If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines 2 years ago, you would have £49.00 today. If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in AIG insurance company 2 years ago, you would have £33.00 today. If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers 6 years ago, you would have nothing today. If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Northern Rock 5 years ago, you would have nothing today But, if you had purchased £1,000 worth of beer one year ago at Tesco's, drunk all the beer, then taken the aluminum cans to the scrap metal dealer, you would have received £214.00. Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. A recent study found that the average Briton walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Britons drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means that, on average, Britons get about 41 miles to the gallon! Makes you proud to be British!
  18. 11 points

    Manchester Arena blast reports

    I'm sorry but I just don't buy into this good triumphing over evil crap that pours out of the media after things like this. The people that jumped in to help out were great and did the right thing. I'd like to think all us right minded people would do the same. But, try telling one of the 19 victims families that good has triumphed over evil because they got a lot of love and a free taxi ride home and I bet they don't see it the same way. As a father myself the only emotion I have is utter hatred and contempt for bastards like those that would deliberately target a venue packed full of children. The evil bomber won. Simple as that. Sorry if I offend anybody.
  19. 11 points

    My E26!

    As many of you will know, it’s BMW’s 100th anniversary this year. To celebrate it, last week end they held a festival which included inviting 1000 cars from various clubs, nominally 10 from each club, for display in the Munich Olympic Park which is just the other side of the road from BMW Welt. I was invited in the M1, so a road trip was on! To protect the front end paintwork I hastily applied some Xpel Tracwrap the night before leaving. Not a very good job, I nick named it Crapwrap, but it would serve the purpose and was to be removed after the trip anyway. IMG_1014a The trip began early on the morning of 7th September, odometer reading 1,705 miles, leaving home in Yorkshire. IMG_1016a IMG_1017a Exactly 4 hours and 241 miles later, I collected a friend in Surrey to share the driving, followed by a quick stop at Munich Legends to say hello as we were passing and have a bit of lunch. They had two other M1’s, their own and the BMW UK car. M1 spot count, 3. IMG_1021 PIC_0649 From there on to the tunnel, slightly concerned about the reported problems, but there were no problems at all. PIC_0657 An evening blast down the almost deserted A26 saw us arrive at Reims to stay the night. Odometer now at 2230, so 525 miles in the day. Brilliant blue sky on the Thursday morning at 8:45 in Reims, the precursor to a very hot day. IMG_1029 More empty French AutoRoute on the A4 to Metz PIC_0665 We weren’t speeding officer, no, really we weren’t! IMG_1035 Then down to Strasbourg to pick up the A35 briefly before crossing the Rhine on the 500 to enter Germany, still not a cloud in the sky and temperatures nudging into the 30’s. PIC_0681 Pushing on up the 5 to Karlsruhe and starting to see what a 36 year old car makes of coming home to the derestricted Autobahn PIC_0685 On to the 8 and past Pforzheim to Stuttgart and Munich PIC_0689 The Germans get 100 Octane V-Power Racing, not cheap though! IMG_1092 Pushing on a little more on the final derestricted run into Munich PIC_0699 Due to the navigator (me!) going entering just ‘Munich’ in the sat nav and not the hotel, we took the circuitous route, right through the middle of the city. PIC_0706 PIC_0708 PIC_0714 Realising our (my) mistake, we then drove out towards the hotel just south of the Olympic Park PIC_0716 Finally getting into the hotel underground car park by about 6:30pm. IMG_1038 The odometer now reading 2668, 963 miles in two days. Turned up at the Olympic park on the Friday just before 9:00 to find 2 other M1s had already arrived PIC_0735 DSC_5897 M1 count, 5. As the day went on, more cars arrived, everyone had been given a slot to reduce queuing. A few Z8’s were quite early DSC_5898 Including a several Alpinas IMG_1045 By Saturday there were well over 20. A definitely used, but beautiful 507 DSC_5899 DSC_5900 PIC_0741 PIC_0747 PIC_0743 The co-driver, a big Alpina fan, was beside himself when he spotted this 8 series B12 5.7, number 057, the last one made, complete with carbon fibre bonnet and de-badged DSC_5907 PIC_0754 Including the intriguing manual box without a clutch pedal IMG_1042 DSC_5912 PIC_0757 PIC_0758 PIC_0759 With an E92 Alpina GT3 on one side DSC_5908 And a rare Glas Coupe arrived and parked on the other side, it sounded great DSC_5910 And a couple of other Glas cars were doted around DSC_5941 DSC_5926 DSC_5927 All sorts of other old and rare BMWs were rolling up DSC_5933 DSC_5934 A lovely 327 DSC_5938 A rare E28 Touring DSC_5930 And a stunning E34 M5 Touring DSC_5937 The 8 series were out in force DSC_5932 So were the Isettas DSC_5924a Including this one complete with period ski set! DSC_5920 And a 2 door (one at the front and one side door) DSC_5921 Motor bikes were included, although there weren’t anything like as many as there were cars PIC_0797 There was a Dixi too DSC_5939 There were also rows of Z1’s and Z3’s. By the time we returned to the car, another 3 M1’s had arrived DSC_5936 DSC_5935 M1 count, 8. There was also a Black M1 belonging to the owner of Mint Classics in Munster who specialise in selling M1’s, taking the count to 9. On Friday afternoon we had a factory tour, interesting but no photos allowed. They make the 3 and 4 series, M4 and M4 GTS. By the time we got to the engine plant work had stopped, they produce the modular 3 and 4 cylinder engines and the older N20 4 cylinder engine. A tour of the new BMW Classic facility had been laid on for both Friday evening and Saturday afternoon. Friday was for ‘overseas’ and Saturday for ‘locals’. As I’d been put in with the German M1 club we had passes for the Saturday, but we blagged our way into the Friday session! Visiting the Classic facility in the original factory, which BMW had to buy back, was amazing. There were loads of cars that you’ve maybe heard about or seen articles on but somehow don’t believe actually exist. The BMW Turbo, one of 2, the other was in the BMW museum IMG_1052 IMG_1075 The 1940 328 Kamm Coupe Mille Miglia IMG_1067 And the 2006 Homage IMG_1053 A ‘standard’ 328 IMG_1072 And the 2011 Homage IMG_1071 A mint yellow 507 IMG_1068 CSL Art Car IMG_1069 2002 GT4 IMG_1065 M1 ProCar (there was another and 3 road going M1’s) and some original Minis (not really in the right place IMO!) IMG_1059 M1 count now 14. Prototype E65/66 7 series extra-long wheel base L7, they only made an E38 L7. IMG_1070 The bonkers ‘goldfish’ with V16 engine that’s so big the radiators had to be put in the boot, feed with air via two large scoops in the rear wings IMG_1064 Loads of other nutty concepts too, no M8 or E39 M5 touring though. Also visible were the Classis work shops where they do work on their collection and restore customer cars (for a considerable fee!). There were several cars at various states of repair, including a 507, another road going M1 and the Piquet ProCar with the map of the Nurburgring on (supposedly done as a joke so Piquet and Stuck would not get lost!) IMG_1073 IMG_1074 M1 count, 16. Food and a presentation were laid on, but we skipped that as we got talking to ‘Dr Ralph’ outside about various nerdy details! A few other cars turned up on Saturday, such as this E46 M3 GTR look alike and E93 M3 GTS. IMG_1086 A quick walk round BMW Welt resulted in another ProCar, again driven by Piquet, this time in Marlborough livery on a ‘grid’ of other racers DSC_5942 M1 count, 17. There was also another area for cars near the BMW museum, amongst others an M4 GTS DSC_5956 And a gaggle of 1Ms DSC_5958 DSC_5959 The BMW museum itself contained lots of interesting stuff, the second Turbo which looked to be in much worse condition than the other DSC_5947 Yet another 507 DSC_5945 The GINA Visionary concept with flexible fabric body DSC_5948 And the Vision concept DSC_5950 Lots of engines, including this intriguing version of the M10 4 cylinder engine DSC_5951 And the final M1 spot of the week end, taking the total to 18. DSC_5953 On the Friday evening there was a concert during which cars from various decades were driven on stage, together with photos and video on the big screens. Strangely, the 40’s didn’t get much screen time! For the 60’s they drove Elvis Presley’s white 507 on stage which has been restored to ‘as new’ from a total wreck by BMW Classic. Difficult to take pictures as it was dark, but here is a panorama before the stadium filled up, it’s only the 180 degrees in front, the back seats were not used and it was over half an hour to the start IMG_1087 And one during the concert IMG_1089 The screens were massive, the central one having a moving section that went up and down depending on the act performing, there was some truly amazing ‘Break Dancing’, classical music, some German performers and Simply Red. Most of the dialog was in German so was lost on me. We escaped just before the end to avoid the crush. The return journey was pretty much the reverse of the outward one. Getting onto the autobahn early on a Sunday has its advantages PIC_0850a Traveling at this speed felt effortless with plenty of power in reserve and absolutely rock solid on the road, but I did not want to push too hard as the wheels are Magnesium which weakens with age. Another beautiful sky on the quiet French toll roads PIC_0861 The tunnel was quite quiet, although this was the Flexi Plus lane as I did not know what time we’d be arriving in Calais so forked out the additional cost so we could get any return train. IMG_1120 Again, no problem with the tunnel, no sign of anything either, but I’d feel a bit apprehensive getting to it in the dark. Finally the car was left at Munich Legends for some work on the suspension and a few other bits, but that’s a different story. Everything on the car worked flawlessly, with the one exception of the fan for the air conditioning. The A/C cooling worked fine, but the secondary ventilation fan sounds like it’s got something stuck inside and occasionally stopped blowing. Switching the A/C off for a few minutes and then back on cured the problem for a while before it came back again. Final odometer reading, 3416, a total of 1711 miles. IMG_1148 We drove for a little over 30 hours and consumed 286.57 Litres of Supper Unleaded over the 1559 miles between fill ups, that’s an average of 24.73 mpg. Given the age and performance of the car, together with the fact that we were cruising at 80-90 mph in France, giving it some welly on the exit from the toll booths and doing 100+ in Germany on most of the derestricted bits, I think that’s quite incredible. An amazing car, amazing trip and memories to last a lifetime. Many thanks to my friend for making the trip so enjoyable too!
  20. 11 points

    Finally my own Workshop!

    Having dreamed about having my own workshop/garage since I was a kid finally got the funds and land to do it. Build started last year in August and was finished in December. No thanks to the shite weather. Anyway here's some pics. Very happy with how it all turned out. Before anything started. Now Some inside shots Currently doing a light restoration on my H26 Hartge. After this is done I'll be doing a light resto on the E34 M5 and then a full resto on an E28 M535i where I will be doing a touring conversion and either a bi turbo setup or a supercharger setup depending how I feel [emoji2] Dreams do come true. Finally mine have.
  21. 11 points

    Donuts funeral

    Donuts funeral will be held on Tuesday the 22nd March at 9:30am followed by a reception in a venue close to the Crematorium. Please contact Donuts brother, lildonut, for more information if you would like to attend. The forum have organised one wreath, BMW5, which has been agreed with the family on behalf of all the members and the legacy he leaves behind.
  22. 11 points

    What Happened....

    The odd popcorn bun fight, sure But, recently we've had an influx of complete and utter muppets with chips on their shoulders who have been getting gobby all over the place and driven a few of the long standing members away (Derin springs to mind). I/we don't have the time or the energy to be constantly baby sitting said muppets so we're now operating a low tolerance policy - 3 strikes and you're outta here type of deal!
  23. 11 points
    You may see it as stupid - I find their loyalty to be honourable.
  24. 11 points

    Top Gear series 22

    From sniffpetrol With Top Gear back on BBC2 this Sunday, car forum RevWheel has taken the unusual step of getting its discussion thread about the programme out of the way in advance. ‘We decided it would be quicker and easier to get the Top Gear thread done before the weekend,’ explained RevWheel moderator, the Reverend Will Moderator. So we asked someone to say they didn’t enjoy the show, and someone else to complain that it’s all “scripted”, and then someone else to moan about the mucking about, and then someone else to say ‘I enjoyed it’ with an emoticon that denotes embarrassment, and then someone else to say they hate it and complain that it isn’t about cars any more, and then someone else to ask why everyone watched it if they don’t like it, and then someone else to agree and point out that it’s an entertainment show not a car show, and then someone else to say it’s time it was cancelled, and then someone else to say it’ll never be cancelled because it makes the BBC too much money, and then someone else to state completely inaccurate facts about how much the show earns, and then someone else to say it’s too “scripted” again, and then someone else to mention William Woollard, and then we just copy and pasted all that over and over and over again until we ended up with 47 pages of repetitive drivel, and that spared us having to do it for real on Sunday night.’ ‘This really has saved a lot of time,’ Rev. Moderator noted. ‘In fact, we’re now considering doing pre-built threads for politics, Chris Harris and the Mazda MX5.’
  25. 10 points

    Winter advice from the AA....

    The AA have warned that due to the extreme weather conditions if traveling it is advisable to take the following: A fully charged mobile phone Sunglasses. Personal medication. First aid kit. A road atlas – in case of diversions. Sat-nav or a printed route for an unfamiliar journey. A blanket, rug or sleeping bag. Shovel. Ice scraper and de-icer. Torch and batteries. Snacks – chocolate or cereal bars. A warm winter coat, scarf, hat, gloves and warm clothes. Waterproofs. Sturdy footwear. A flask of hot drink. I felt a complete twat getting on the bus!
  26. 10 points

    What did you do to your E60/61 today?

    not today but on Saturday gave the car a clean, nice bit of snow foam, 2 bucket method wash and put it in the garage + hoovered the interior. In antisipation of the nice weather on Sunday I thought I'd treat it to a coat of show wax (only lasts a month but the gloss is worth it) gave the wheels a polish with AG super resin polish and applied Sonax wheel sealant to them. it's dirty again now but was worth it for this picture on Sunday
  27. 10 points
    Thanks for your support. It's a free site run by volunteers sadly we lost the site owner and thus the full access to the software. We are trying to get it sorted along with the family though of course they really don't have too. I'm thankful that we've been able to keep it going at all but hey.... Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  28. 10 points
  29. 10 points

    Wrapped My Touring.....

    Good job you quoted all the pictures for your one word response.
  30. 10 points

    A wee jaunt into France

    As mentioned elsewhere, took the M5 down to Le Mans over the weekend. I've owned it for a couple of years now but have only managed about 1500 miles in it since then, so this was a trip I really wanted to do in it. With the weather forecasts showing mid-30s over the weekend, the first job before I could leave was to get the air con sorted - it was still running the old R12 gas, but needed converting to R134a. On went the retrofit kit, down to the garage to get the gas topped up and.....nothing. Turns out there were two issues - the high pressure switch didn't work (was a used replacement as the old one snapped in half on removal) and the gas was leaking out around where it screwed in. Cue an overnight replacement from Tims (thanks!), some sealant around it to stop it leaking and it was back down for a re-gas, which worked perfectly. And it's a good thing that it did, as the temps on the way down got a bit silly: As I was late booking, I had to go on the Eurotunnel rather than the Portsmouth->Le Havre/Caen ferry, which added a couple of hundred miles in each direction - perfect for catching up on some pre-race podcasts! One concession to modernity I have is a Kenwood head unit with built-in Bluetooth - ideal for streaming audio, taking calls and getting the TomTom instructions through. Wouldn't be without it. Anyway, the long slog through mainland France went at a steady 80/85, taking in the Autoroute until near Rouen, then diverting via Yvetot to Bourg-Achard before picking up the Autoroute again towards Le Mans. Rouen can be fine, but it's not a pretty place so going around it works for me - it adds about 10 mins, but is worthwhile. It also means that you get the stunning views as you go over the bridge at Pont-Audemer. From there I continued towards Le Mans, but that wasn't to be my first stop, and so I watched the Le Mans turn-off sail past as I continued the extra 70ish miles towards Saumur, where I needed to swing by Langlois-Chateau to pick up some wine. The outside temps still hadn't dropped by the time I got there, so it took a deep breath before I could leave the air-conditioned cocoon of the M5 and walk across the car park into the shop. With armfuls of bottles I headed back to the car, played a five minute game of Pack-An-E28-Tetris, then headed back towards Le Mans, air con still set to max. The route north towards the campsite is one I hadn't taken before, and setting the TomTom to avoid toll roads took me through some wonderful French towns and villages, and an hour or so later brought me into the campsite via a route that missed out almost all of the traffic around the circuit. Finally, 11 hours after leaving home I had arrived! The usual Le Mans experience then ensued, although this year it started by all the neighbours on the campsite wanting to come see the car - strangely, I didn't get that last year in the X5! Not far from me was a lovely French Dakar E36 M3 which looked factory fresh, and the group on the next pitch had a pair of Audi RS5s and an A5 TDi. Apart from the badge and the noise, it was hard to tell them apart... Anyway, tent pitched, camp setup and it was nearing time for evening practice: There's something a bit special about the Le Mans circuit, and even more so as night descends. This year I had a grandstand seat, which gave a rather good view heading up to the Dunlop bridge: but also put me right opposite the far end of the pits: The rest of the weekend was the usual mix of racing, camping and drinking: You'll always see some things that you can never un-see, but that's the risk you take: And then in no time at all it was time to head home. The reverse route took me back to the Tunnel, and then into Blighty and home. The final tally saw the figures looking like this: 965 miles covered over 5 days at an average of 18.9mpg. Average speed was around 50mph. But what the numbers don't reflect is that this is a 30 year old car that sits effortlessly on the motorway at 80mph, rarely requires you to drop a gear to overtake, has all the mod-cons required and yet will still turn in a decent performance on a back road. A combination of the constant 80mph on the way down and the 530d I usually tool around in day-to-day makes it easy to forget that this engine will rev to 7k, and when it does sounds fan-bloody-tastic. Sod the economy, it's worth it to turn petrol into that noise. And so we're back. I've imported many kilos of dead French flies, a couple of wheel arches full of French campsite mud and discovered that there's some wear in the steering assembly which needs addressing soon. Otherwise no issues, no complaints and no doubt that it was the right tool for the job. Would I have any qualms about setting off on another 1000 mile round trip in it tomorrow? Absolutely not. If you've thought about going to Le Mans but never done it, I'd say get booked for next year pronto - it's going to sell out fast.
  31. 10 points
    A guy gets a call from the police telling him his house was robbed. The offender had also consumed all of his beer and had raped his wife. A moment of silence passes and the guy says, “I can't believe they shagged my wife after only five tinnies!†____________________________________________________ "My missus kicked me out after she caught me measuring my dick. It just reaches the back of her sister’s throat!†____________________________________________________ I was shagging this Sheila over her kitchen table when we heard the front door open. She said, “It’s my husband! Quick, try the back door!†Thinking back, I really should have legged it – but you don’t get offers like that every day. ____________________________________________________ Sorry for not calling you on New Year’s, I just got out of jail. I got locked up for punching this bloke at a party. In my defence... When you hear an Arab counting down from 10, your instincts kick in. ____________________________________________________ I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money. Last night I shagged a Sheila called Penny – spooky or what? ____________________________________________________ The missus asked me, “When you’re on a boys only trip away, do you think about me?†Apparently “Only to stop myself coming too quickly†wasn’t the right answer. ____________________________________________________ My wife is pissed off with me again. I crept into the bedroom last night and swapped her tampon for a party popper. She has no sense of humour. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10 Catholic Priests were killed in a road accident. At the Pearly Gates, St. Peter says. If any of you are Paedophiles, you can F*** Off down to HELL Nine of them start to walk away when St Peter calls out. “And take this deaf bastard with youâ€. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The wife said to me last night. “If you turn the bedside lamp off I'll take it up the arseâ€. Maybe I should have waited for the bulb to cool down first. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My mate reckons he always cries after sex. Mind you.... He is in Prison. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The wife came out of the bathroom and said: “I have just shaved my pussy and you know what that means don't youâ€? I said. “Yeah, the bloody plug hole is blocked againâ€! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Nearly shagged a Ladyboy last night. Picked him up in a night club. He looked like a woman. Smelled like a woman. Danced like a woman. Even kissed like a woman. But, as we arrived back at his apartment, he reversed his car into a tight parking slot in one fluid movement. That's when I thought, “Hang about!â€
  32. 10 points

    I've just ordered a new car!

    OK, enough. It's the M6 Gran Coupe. I initially was going to go for the 640d, but as bm530 said having considered both if I'd gone for the 640d then the M6 would always niggle in the back of my mind! I find it quite staggering that the 640d will do 0-62 in 5.5 seconds, which is only a fraction slower than the E39 M5, but has an official urban consumption of 58.9mpg! 58.9! Of course you won't see that in real life, but even so it's quite an achievement. There are also some amazing discounts on the M6 at the moment, really quite significant. Without asking, on a stock car with no options you get £12,710 off list plus up to 4 years interest free credit with minimal deposit, with some options and a bit of haggling there's quite a bit more to be had. Yes it will depreciate like shares in Lehman brothers, but you only live once and it's an incentive to keep it for longer! I really thought the E39 M5 would be the last performance car I'd be able to drive, but this is another opportunity and I just felt it was too good to miss. The M5 GC is significantly different to the F10 M5 in many small ways, which all add up to a significantly different package. The dash is more driver focused, it's not such a big slab in your face. You sit lower and feel more connected to everything somehow. The interior has a very special feel about it, the F10 feels OK, but it's based on a mass market saloon where most of the cars are the 520d. Yes, I'll have to get used to the DCT transmission but I'm sure I will. The engine of course is the same as the F10, but slightly different to the X5M and X6M, so is the transmission. Finally, with the M6 GC, I hopefully won't feel the need to press the E39 into daily duties, with a lesser car that would be quite some temptation. I know, I've been there before with the 330d. Not sure when it will arrive exactly, I'd guess it may arrive at the dealer this coming week for collection maybe the week after at the earliest.
  33. 10 points
    ^^ As many a wise man have said: "No matter how good she looks, someone, somewhere is sick and tired of putting up with her shit"
  34. 9 points

    Oh the irony!

  35. 9 points

    My third E39! :)

    Well if all goes to plan, I'm picking up a silver 530i Sport Auto tomorrow morning - my first petrol E39 (Excuse the dull pics, it was getting dark!) I'll be the 12 owner! However, it's only got 125k miles on it, very clean indeed, especially inside there's little signs of wear. It's got four new tyres, a lot of new suspension and cooling system components and drives beautifully. Spec isn't too bad, not as good as my old 530d sadly. Prof sat nav (MK4), heated seats, a Baris upgraded amp with AUX and removable tow bar. Looking forward to burning some petrol for a change!!
  36. 9 points

    E60 535d M sport - My new daily

    Hi All Here are some pics of my new daily smoker. Having a car related business, one particular customer owns a number of very exotic cars (599 GTB, F430 Suderia, Alfa 8C) and this particular car was his daily drive that he used for travelling the length of the country and over to italy. It's done 140k but has a mega FSH at BMW and everything needed doing had been done with no expense spared. Traditionally I'd always swerved higher mileage cars thinking they would be a wallet opener but this beauty is testament to the fruits of correct maintenance and what I see as one of BMWs better periods. The base spec is great and has been complimented with a few very nice upgrades. Upgrades F10 CIC and software TV in motion code Quaife Limited Slip Diff (fitted by Birds) Standard spec M LA WHEELS DOUBLESP. SPORT AUTOMATIC TRANSMISSION EMERGENCY WHEEL M SPORT PACKAGE GREEN STRIPE WINDSCREEN INTERIOR TRIM FINISHERS ALU PENTAN FLOOR MATS, VELOUR INTERIOR AND EXTERIOR MIRROR PACKA INTERIOR RR VW MIRROR W AUT ANTI-D SEAT ADJUSTM., ELECTR. W. MEMORY CHILD SEAT ISOFIX ATTACHMENT SPORT SEATS F DRIVER / FRONT PASSENGER SEAT HEATING F DRIVER / FRONT PASSENGER LANE DEVIATION WARNING HEADLIGHT WASHER SYSTEM PARK DISTANCE CONTROL (PDC) XENON LIGHT ADAPTIVE HEADLIGHTS DVD SYSTEM AT REAR, PREPARATION USB- / AUDIO INTERFACE TV FUNCTION NAVIGATION SYSTEM PROFESSIONAL BMW ASSIST BMW ONLINE VOICE INPUT SYSTEM PREP.MOB. PH. BUSINESS BLUET.INTERF. DAB TUNER CD CHANGER BMW FOR 6 CDS M SPORT SUSPENSION M LEATHER STEERING WHEEL M AERODYNAMICS PACKAGE M REAR SPOILER INDIVIDUAL HIGH-GLOSS SATIN CHROME INDIVIDUAL SUN PROTECTION GLAZING INDIVIDUAL ROOF-LINING ANTHRACITE CUPHOLDER AUTOMATIC AIR CONDITIONING CRUISE CONTROL WITH BRAKING FUNCTION Modifications EGR delete Swirl Flap delete Modified engine map Big ticket replacements New small turbo New boost pipe from turbo to intercooler Vac lines Turbo pressure controller Main thermostat New brakes (BMW) In a nutshell I couldn't turn it down when he asked if I wanted to buy it. I own a couple of tasty petrol cars but I'm a sucker for a big TDI for lazy driving. What has surprised me the most about this car is the power. It's extremely fast. Staggeringly fast to be honest - way more power than needed for daily driving and family transport. The seats are great - everything on them is electric; even the leg extension and headrest. The steering wheel is electric too - not seen that before. Here's a few hasty pics - I'll post some better ones when I get chance
  37. 9 points
  38. 9 points
    Battery problem solved....
  39. 9 points

    My E26!

    I was at Gaydon yesterday for the BMW Car Club festival, and took part in the concourse on Saturday. Staying up until 9:30pm until it got dark, and then getting up again at 4:30am just as it was getting light to finish prepping the car payed off. On another note, I'd noticed that my car was missing two parts in the engine bay. Looking at other cars, there are shaped plastic uprights that fasten on to two bosses on the main chassis. They fit into the buttresses on the engine bay cover, presumably to change the airflow in some way. There appear to be at least two versions, you can see them on either side in these two pictures, above the expansion tank and dip stick. Early version from chassis number 4301013 Later version from chassis number 4301108 Most cars seem to have these parts. They attach by 2 bolts to the boss on the chassis. However, not only was I missing the parts, but there are no holes in the boss to fit the bolts to! Appologies for the back focused picture The parts are NLA from BMW and they are not just a flat plate, they have a hoop on which goes round the tubular chassis member. So, I borrowed a pair from another M1 owner had them digitised and 3D printed Using the highest quality printer and mode, these took over 20 hours each to print. The finish is not identical as the originals are moulded, but they are not bad. I also noticed that some cars had the top edge wrapped in a trim strip and others did not. The variations may all just be due to the way the Italian assembly operators felt on the day, the availability of parts, of that bits have fallen off or been removed at some point over the last 37 years, who knows. As the parts only arrived last Friday, I temporarily attached them with double sided foam tape.
  40. 9 points
    Anytime, I'm sure he has some pain left All finished today just need to source some arch liners and clips for the screen trim
  41. 9 points

    My new bimmer

    After itching for a change and looking at 335i's for quite some time, I finally found one with the right spec at the right price. Got a few niggles to sort out but all in all a very clean car and nice to drive something a bit quicker for a change.
  42. 9 points

    My E26!

    On holiday for a week.
  43. 9 points

    What did you do to your E60/61 today?

    Mine's debadged
  44. 9 points

    E60-61 Facebook Group

    To be fair, anything with less than 6 cylinders does devalue the model
  45. 9 points

    In memory of Donut

    After 10 years working as a Paramedic please could all people put themselves and their passengers behind seatbelts; I've been to many accidents with occupants wearing and not wearing brlts and whilst there is never any kind of guarantee your chances of survival are generally 100 fold better behind a belt than not. RIP Donut.
  46. 9 points

    Council complaints.

    Only in Britain - Complaints to Councils - extracts from letters written to local councils:...(All bona-fide) 1. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow. 2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off. 3. I wish to complain that my father twisted his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage. 4. Their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence. 5. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other day that blew them off. 6. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand? 7. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall. 8. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant. 9. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen. 10.. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster, and 50% are just plain filthy. 11.. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers. 12.. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.. 13.. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink. 14.. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now is in three pieces. 15.. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me. 16.. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous. 17.. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it. 18.. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night. 19.. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife. 20.. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction. 21.. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2. 22.. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it. 23.. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.
  47. 9 points

    What options do you actually need?

    Big fuck off engine
  48. 9 points

    Dropped the ball big style!

    An Insignia? Yep, you've dropped the ball there.
  49. 9 points

    What did your parents do ?

    My mother was a hamster and my father smelled of elderberries....
  50. 9 points

    It's nearly time for the big vote

    'Hell mend us'? 'laughing stock'? 'Shitstorm'? 'I sure as hell have lost the loving feeling with Scotland'. Forgive me for pointing this out but not even 24 hours ago you were full of nationalistic fervour. All that has happened is a vote in a democractic society. You shouldn't throw all your toys out of the pram just because you didn't get your way. Scotland is still Scotland, you are still Scottish and the entire political system throughout the United Kingdom has a kick to the gonads and is due for a shake up. That shake-up should see a fairer system of representation and democracy across the United kingdom, not just Scotland. Living in a democracy has freedoms, such as the unfettered vote you have just cast, but hand in hand with those freedoms go responsibilities, which is now to accept the democractic will of the majority. Falling out of love with your homeland over this vote smacks of someone who has always had his own way and is having a tantrum about not getting their own way now. Scotland hasn't changed, all that has happened is that the people who live there have voiced their opinion. They've in all probability (judging by the stack of interviews) pretty much always held those opinions on which they voted so you've been living within that environment for probably all of your life. The fact you are so upset about hearing it out loud could mean a number of things, from outright delusional, to merely not understanding the man or woman in the street standing next to you. A knee-jerk reaction emmigration should be tempered with two things; 1. A good, long, hard look at the country you plan to go to - the grass is not always greener. 2. A good, long, hard look at the country you live in now - the grass is not always greener. Good luck in your decision. I don't think AS could have done everything differently. Quite simply, due to International, EU and UK rules and regulation which must be followed he couldn't guarantee any of his so called promises.EU Membership? Never going to happen without EU agreement of the entire UK deciding to break up the Union. Self partitioning regions are a threat to nearly half of the EU member countries and as such they will always resist a partisan break-up of a EU member as it is in their own States interest. Currency? Independence is simply that, independence with an independent currency. His declaration that Scotland will keep the Pound and have a Currency Union with the rest of the rest of the UK was just hopeless lies. The analogy of a wife getting a divorce but keeping the credit card but not the debts is entirely accurate. Budget? Salmonds socialist nirvana is unaffordable and he knows it. He won't get long to lick his wounds as he has to declare the NHS cuts he was trying to hide away, and due to the wide-ranging exposure of the referendum nearly everyone in the UK knows of the Barnett formula and its obvious inequities toward the poorer parts of the rest of the United Kingdom. NATO Membership? Oil ownership? Immigration? Border controls? All of these elements he failed to address accurately and honestly and given that it was a 'Once in a lifetime opportunity' I personally always thought it was deplorable and disgusting that the man, his team and his Party never honestly thought through every single aspect of the potential challenges to Scotland becoming Independent and presented all those cohesive, solid propositions toward the Scottish Electorate. Alex Salmond has shown himself to be a fantastic orator and a wiley politician but he has been exposed as a charlatan with no genuine answers for all his high hopes and wild ambition.